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today ruwet banget kepala gue 🙃

 gak kerasa harus ucapin selamat tinggal sama tahun 2021. perasaan baru kemarin ngucapin selamat tinggal sama tahun 2020. rasanya masih asing nulis 2021.


besok udah harus nulis 2022. aneh ya, banget. 

mungkin buat kalian biasa aja. but buat aku rasanya waktu cepet banget berlalu. 


dan aku masih disini, masih gini aja. rasanya kaya kehabisan waktu, di kejar² waktu dan takut kehabisan waktu :'(.


tapi aku sadar bahwa semua itu hanya di pikiran aku aja. di  realife ternyata sama sekali gak kaya gitu. 


tadi abis berselancar di media sosial applikasi instagram banyak banget berita negative hari ini. entah kekerasan seksual, kasus nya ka laura gak udah² (semoga di permudah ya ka lau) justiceforkalaura.


dan masih banyak kasus lagi, sumpah enek banget abis baca berita-berita negative gitu.. 


terus di tambah lagi gua punya temen dia bisa di bilang lupa sama kulitnya. udah biasa si ya temen kaya gitu, sebelum ni dia pacaran. apa apa sama gue. dulu berantem minta solusinya ke gue. 


jujur gua cemburu temen gua lebih pro ke pacarnya. gua sebagai teman di lupain gitu aja. ditambah sekarang gak boleh maen kesana sini. 





gak tau sama gue, kemarin sih dia ngajak main cuma kaya gak niat gitu tiba-tiba hilang kabar aja chat gua di diemin.


gapapa 2021 bener-bener ngajarin gue buat kuat sendiri, belajar apa-apa sendiri dan gak mudah bergantung sama orang lain. 


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ikhlas.

I'm studying, learning about how to let go, learning how to control emotions, and learning to be sincere about what God has outlined. It's all easy to hear and accept the ears of many people but difficult to do. Sincere. Is it good to be called? Magic words but in fact, it's hard to do, it's really hard to accept what God has outlined. Yes, I know God gave me that line so that when God gave me a heavier line I wouldn't fall back. God is good. God loves his strong people. The essence of the line from this article is God knows what is best for his people, God wants his people to always learn from all the lines he gives and God wants his people to sincerely accept all the lines he sets.   Sincerity is a magic word that is difficult to do -ca-
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The most painful words?

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buat kamu im

  rasanya masih sama, perasaan aku masih sama seperti tahun kemarin. tapi kayanya kamu gak sama ya. padahal aku berharap kita bisa sama sama kaya kemarin. ahh iyaiya. rasanya masih kemarin tapi kamu udah sama dia.  aku dengan diriku hehe. aku boleh jahat gak sih. tapi aku bingung harus buat jahat gimana. gak tau harus gimana gitu. yaa.. sebenrnya gak harus gimana-gimana cukup diam dan liat kamu sama dia. tubuh aku gapapa liat kamu sama  dia, tapi hati aku gak terima gimana dong?.  jujur aku belum bisa lupa, walaupun cuma sebentar ya. menurut aku cukup berkesan. karena disitu aku baru bisa buka hati kembali dan di patahkan sama kamu. padahal aku gak berfikir kamu gak akan patahin hati aku. ternyata sama aja..  tapi aku lega sih, kamu bisa nemuin orang yang bikin kamu bahagia. yang bisa bikin kamu nyaman, bikin kamu ketawa, bikin kamu sayang sama diri kamu. kan kalo sama aku kebalikannya. kata kamu kita gak sinckron. aku bingung gak sinckron gimana. padahal aku ng...
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